


What's the Colour of Love?

by Andithiel



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Sex but not explicit, Freckles, HP Battleships 2019, Harry Potter Epilogue Compliant, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Second Person, Pining, Poetic lemon, Professional Quidditch player James Sirius, Resolved Sexual Tension, Too revealing clothes, Twister - Freeform, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unspeakable Teddy Lupin, thirsty teddy lupin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 05:45:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19739485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andithiel/pseuds/Andithiel
Summary: Teddy has been looking forward to spending the summer with the Potters. He was not prepared for the force of nature that is one James Sirius Potter.





	What's the Colour of Love?

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Battleships, prompt: Things get complicated when you see someone you've always known in a new light. Perspectives change and so do feelings, and suddenly you're secretly pining for something you shouldn't be. Choose either ~~1) A Hopeful Moment in Pining -OR-~~ 2) Someone (The Object of Your Affection -OR- Someone Else) notices and confronts you. *BONUS +2 Points for 2nd Person POV
> 
> Asalways thanks to the ever amazing [Kristinabird](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kristinabird/pseuds/Kristinabird) for the beta <3  
> 

You were unprepared for this to happen. It was just supposed to be a nice summer vacation in a beach house with the Potters, a well earned break from your hectic work as an Unspeakable. You had envisioned lazy days spent in the sun, bathing, drinking beer and reconnecting with Lily and Albus (and Scorpius, who always seems to come with the package). You had imagined spending the evenings catching up on your reading, or playing board games, talking to Harry and Ginny long into the nights about everything and nothing.

The first week lulled you into the safety of their domestic life, everyone so happy to get you to sit down for more than a few minutes, to get to know you again in a way.

You weren’t prepared for the force of nature that is James Sirius Potter.

Yes, you’ve heard his matches on the wireless, distantly following his career as a professional Quidditch player in France. The two of you have even exchanged letters here and there, yours always apologetic about how little time you have to write something longer, his always blotted with ink as if he’s been eager to get the words down as soon as possible, not even bothering with a spell check charm. But words on parchment and match commentaries can’t convey the metamorphosis that James has gone through. The year spent abroad, the countless training sessions and games, have made him stronger, taller, fiercer. He’s not the same little boy that used to follow you around everywhere, demanding your undivided attention and your stories. He’s a man now. A man you can’t take your eyes off of, a man you can’t stop thinking about.

The sight of James, beautiful, boisterous James, when he arrives a week into your vacation like a whirlwind, takes your breath away. You realise your life has been black and white and greyscale up until now, and James is the colour that you have so desperately been craving. 

Initially you try to brush it off as a stupid crush. Everyone seems to have a crush on James, Scorpius included even though he’s with Albus, why should you be an exception? But the more time you spend with him, the more you understand that you want to be with him all the time, you can’t get enough of him.

The way he seems so comfortable in his body makes you relax, and you realise your shoulders have been hitched up at least an inch, you don’t even know for how long. You like yourself more when you’re around him, he makes you more interesting. His focus and questions as you tell him about your work makes you see it in a new light, makes you appreciate it further.

It frightens you more than you want to admit.

But it doesn’t matter that it feels completely wrong, that you’re worried about how Harry will react to the fact that you can’t stop thinking about what you want to do with his son. You are utterly and completely lost.

* * *

In only one day the sweltering heat has been replaced with cold rain. Summer is undecided, teetering on the edge, but you have never been more sure of anything in your life: that James Potter will be the death of you. 

You thought it would be a relief, not being around a half dressed James, constantly being more or less turned on by his naked torso and nipples on display, his tanned skin glistening with drops of water as he lies on his towel to dry. But it turns out it’s even worse huddled inside, where there’s no place to escape. He is everywhere, his bouncing energy filling up every space, and it would be annoying, except that it isn’t, because the only thing you crave is to have more of him. 

“Anyone up for a game?” he says one evening, looking like an eager puppy. You have a sudden vision of him wagging his tail.

Albus and Lily rush over to the bookshelf where the games are, loudly debating with James over which one to pick. Scorpius throws you an intimidated look, but you only have eyes for James, as always, the way he argues so fiercely for his option, his eyes alight, his unruly hair moving with each flick of his head, and finally his triumphant roar when his younger siblings grudgingly accept his suggestion.

“We’re playing Twister!” he announces happily. 

Dread settles deep in your gut. This is a bad idea.

You try your best to get out of playing, offering to be the referee, but Scorpius beats you to it and you end up on the same team as Lily to play against Albus with James and Ginny with Harry. Everyone else is excited for the game, even more so after a few rounds and a couple of beers into the game, and suddenly you find yourself facing him in the next round, placing your feet on the coloured spots. 

“Let’s go, Lupin,” James says with a cocky grin, doing a bunch of jumping jacks and stretching his neck and pecs. 

“Stop it Jamie, you’re making Teddy uncomfortable,” Lily says and you realise you’ve been ogling. Again.

James stops immediately, glancing quickly at you before shoving his sister with his shoulder, muttering “The name’s James.”

It turns out James has a strategy when playing: to move closer and closer to you, forcing himself under you, and soon you find yourself straddling his back, the others giggling maniacally, while you’re thankful that for once James has a shirt on. 

“Left hand yellow!” Scorpius calls out, and James moves quick like a snake, stealing the spot you were aiming for, meaning you have to reach around him, almost like an embrace. Your breath is hot against his throat, and this close you can see he has a dusting of tiny freckles all over his neck, disappearing down his collar. You want to kiss them all, your body aches for it. James gasps, almost inaudible, making you unsure if you’ve accidentally voiced your thoughts, but no one else reacts. You try not to notice the heat from his body, his breath coming in shallow bursts, his intoxicating smell, his damn distracting freckles that may or may not cover his entire body, which you really need to find out. You’re willing yourself to focus on the game and that his entire family is watching.

“Right foot blue!”

Once again James is too quick for you, predicting where you’re aiming and intercepting you, and you lose your balance when reaching for another spot, falling on your side and dragging him with you. You lie in a tangled mess with your arm still around him, the others are laughing, Albus is shouting triumphantly, but all you can focus on is to not pull James closer and leaving biting kisses all over that freckled neck and shoulder.

James turns around, his eyes shining with mirth, but when he looks at you something shifts in them, you’re not sure what he sees. Panicking, you stand up quickly, brushing your sweaty palms on your thighs. Belatedly you realise this looks like you’re a sore loser and you try to fix it by extending your hand towards him.

“Good match, Potter,” you mumble as you’ve hoisted him up, then take a seat beside Lily, hoping your embarrassment goes unnoticed.

You’re going to need another vacation after this one.

* * *

The next morning you find him already in the kitchen as you come downstairs, his hair ruffled from sleep and his clothes rumpled. He gives you a sleepy smile, eyes squinting, and silently offers you coffee. You can barely speak for wanting him so badly.

“That…Are those my old trackies?” you hear yourself say, still standing in the doorway.

James scratches at his stomach absentmindedly, looking down on his body.

“Yeah, I guess they are,” he says. “I think I got them from you as a hand me down ages ago, didn’t I? They’re my favourite, I’ve never been able to throw them away.” He turns a bit, showing off his arse and you should look away, you really should, but apparently he wants you to look, it would be rude not to, right? 

“Aren’t they,” you have to clear your throat, your vocal cords suddenly not cooperating “aren’t they a bit worn out?”

You try desperately but fail to avoid staring at the once green fabric, now greyed with age and a million washes. They’re so thin they barely conceal his strong legs, the curve of his firm arse and _dear sweet Merlin_ his cock, almost visible through them. And you remember how you used to wear them as a teenager, how smooth they felt against your skin, and you almost want to reach out and touch them. Only to see if they’re still as soft as you remember them, definitely not to get closer to James, who is now looking intently at you, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. 

“I think they only improve with time,” he says, regarding you for a moment. “Here, feel them.” You’re not sure if it’s only your imagination or if his voice suddenly sounds huskier. Either way the effect on you is instant, the sound of him offering you to touch him piquing your interest a little too much.

“Gods, I could kill for a cup of coffee!”

You whip around, cheeks flushing, to see Lily behind you, a serene smile on her face.

“Oi, James, did you drink all the coffee?” she says, spotting the empty pot on the kitchen counter, not noticing that you’re on fire.

James shrugs, flashing his sister a cheeky grin.

“You’re too young for coffee.”

Lily shrieks and the fight is on instantly, Lily chasing her brother around the adjoining living room, James howling with laughter, until they’re both rolling around on the floor, tickling each other mercilessly, and you find yourself jealous of Lily who is allowed to touch James like that, to tease him until there’s tears streaming down his face and he’s shouting “Fine! I surrender! I’ll make you another pot!” 

He scrambles up and saunters over to the sink where you’re standing. You’re desperately trying to ground yourself, turning on the tap to pour yourself some cold water, but then James is there, snickering, pressing himself against you to get to the sink before you. When he turns away your side is burning, it must be glowing from his touch. When he reaches for the coffee the lax elastic of his trackies makes them slide down and you’re not staring, you really aren’t, except that you are, and now you can see some of his pubic hairs sticking up from under the waistline and _fuck_ you’ve already had a morning wank, how can your cock perk up like this and, most importantly, how will you be able to hide it?

To your immense relief the rest of the Potters arrive a moment later, the kitchen bustling with seven different individuals trying to agree on what to have for breakfast. When Lily and Albus start bickering about who should get the last of the Weetabix, only to have them snagged away by James to their indignation, and the others’ amusement, you take the opportunity to sneak off to the garden.

You’ve only just sat down under the birch tree and had a sip of coffee, when there’s a rustle behind you and James plops down on the chair at your left.

“I think it’s safer for me out here than inside, Albus and Lily are definitely plotting my imminent death.” He takes a spoonful of cereal, not looking the least bit regretful. You have to snort.

“Sorry, maybe I’m intruding? Did you want to be alone?” he says before shoving in another bite.

You shift in your seat, checking that your previous arousal isn’t too obvious, then shake your head and give him a faint smile. “No it’s fine, I’d like to sit with you.”

His mouth ticks up at one corner, he looks so pleased and you want to make him smile like this forever.

You sit together in silence, only broken by the chirping of the birds and the steady chomping of James’ breakfast. You relax more and more, thinking that maybe this wouldn’t be so bad, the idea of the two of you together.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” James voice shakes you out of your thoughts. “How come your hair gets a more green shade sometimes?”

You pull at a strand to examine it, finding it indeed more turquoise than your usual blue.

You shrug. “I’ve only seen it get this way when I’m uncomfortable.”

His face falls immediately, making you wonder what you did wrong.

“It’s just… I’ve noticed it gets like that a lot when you’ve been around me,” he mumbles, looking down.

You sit there, frozen, trying to comprehend what he’s saying, only realising what it means after he has knocked his chair over in his haste to get away from you.

* * *

You’re sitting by yourself on the beach, watching wave after wave crashing against the sand, letting the sound soothe you. The stars have only just woken up, Vega shining bright in the north east.

James has been nowhere to be seen the entire day.

You’re exhausted. A month of trying to hide how you feel about James, not just from him but from everybody, has worn you thin. You’re not sure how much more you can take. It’s not often your body morphs of its own will without you noticing it.

Maybe you should tell them that you’re needed back at work and spend the rest of the summer with Victoire or go to France and stay with your grandmother and her sister. James’ absence this day has come as somewhat of a relief, even if you can’t shake the feeling that you’ve fucked things up somehow.

Someone clears their throat behind you.

“Mind if I sit down?”

You peer up at Harry, shaking your head and he folds his legs and joins you on the sand.

The two of you sit like that for a long time, silent. You know what he wants to talk about, but you’re too afraid to initiate it.

“It’s been a few intense weeks,” he finally says tentatively, and you shrug.

“I guess.”

“I’ve really enjoyed… We’ve all enjoyed spending time with you again, Teddy.”

“Yeah. Me too,” you say, barely recognising your own voice. “Thanks for having me.” 

“I think…,” Harry hedges, waits, starts over. “Maybe you’ve enjoyed spending time with someone specific?”

The best thing right now would probably be to deny it all, to tell Harry that you have no idea what he’s talking about, and then proceed to push down your feelings, possibly forever. But you can’t even do that, you can’t deny it, and you can’t confirm it. Hugging your legs you rest your chin on top of your knees, holding your breath. You wait for him to tell you to back off, that you’re pathetic for thinking someone like James would want to be with someone like you.

“For what it’s worth, Teddy, I think he likes being around you too.”

You turn your head so fast you hear your neck crick. Harry looks at you, smiling but looking uncomfortable. Knowing him and how hard he finds it to talk about these things he must be very sure of it. At your raised eyebrows he nods.

“You should go talk to him.”

* * *

It takes you a while to find James. You have an embarrassing encounter with Albus and Scorpius necking on the sofa, you bump into Ginny on her way out to join Harry for a night swim. It’s Lily who eventually pokes her head out from her room and with a knowing smile tells you that James is in his room.

Slowly you climb the stairs, palms sweaty, heart beating. You stand outside, undecided, peering inside. This is the first time you’ve seen the room that James has stayed in for your vacation. You’ve passed it on several occasions, stubbornly avoiding looking into it for fear of catching a glimpse of him in even less clothes than he’s prone to wearing. There are books and magazines strewn everywhere, James’ bag stands opened on his bed, bits of clothing sticking out from it.

When you knock tentatively, he turns, his shoulders uncharacteristically hunched.

“Oh, it’s you,” he mumbles, casting his eyes down.

“Are you packing?”

He sighs, blowing away the hair falling in his eyes. “Yeah. I have to… I need to get away. Quidditch practise. You know how it is.”

“I thought you said you had the entire summer off.”

James flushes, scrubbing at his neck which makes him look so much like his father. “Yeah, well…”

You chew on your bottom lip, not sure how to proceed. “Did I do something?”

His head snaps up.

“No! No you’re fine! It’s not you, it’s me, I have to… I have to get away. You know, silly old James, always has to be where the fun is,” he says, trying to joke, but you know that’s not him, you know that’s what everyone thinks of him, but he’s not like that at all.

“And this is no place for fun?”

He looks down again. “I thought so at first, but…”

The sight of James, usually so confident and loud, being this quiet and fidgety makes your heart clench. You take a breath, summoning courage.

“Would it make a difference if I said I would miss you?”

He swallows, his adam’s apple bobbing.

“Don’t… don’t say that to make me feel better. I know you think I’m just that stupid kid that used to follow you around all the time and—”

He stops when you take two quick strides towards him, not daring to close the distance entirely but close enough to feel his body heat radiating towards you, close enough to reach out a hand to place on his arm.

“You’re not a stupid kid, you’re… you’re magnificent, James.”

He looks at you, his eyes wide, incredulous.

“But you’ve barely even bothered to speak to me for these past weeks,” he says, his voice almost breaking at the end.

A laugh escapes you and he looks at you like you’ve gone mad. Perhaps you have. 

“I’ve been too afraid to embarrass myself!” you tell him. “I can barely control myself when I’m around you.”

“What, really?”

It’s a surprise to you that James doesn’t know how desirable he is, how his presence affects you, how tightly wound you’ve been all this time.

“Yeah. Really.”

The smile he gives you could outshine the sun, and then you have a vision of blurry freckles, bright hazel eyes and unruly hair as he closes the distance, crashing your lips together.

“So lose it,” he whispers, “lose control, Teddy.”

James kisses the same way he plays Quidditch, determined, sure, focused and with a presence that makes your head spin. The warm musky smell of him makes you melt, makes you hold on to him tighter for fear of falling over, of literally falling for this man.

“Fuck Jamie,” you sigh before remembering he doesn’t like people calling him that.

“Say it again,” he whispers against your lips. “Say it again.”

“Jamie,” you obey, your whole body, your whole being chanting _Jamie Jamie Jamie **Jamie**_.

His arms, so strong as he hoists you up and carries you to the bed, your legs around his waist. His lips so soft, so pliant as he kisses you until you’re breathless, gasping for air. His moans reverberate in your own body as you open him slowly, it’s like music to your ears the way he whispers your name, the way he eggs you on deeper, _deeper,_ and you’re on fire, surely you will combust of the heat that is his body giving way to you, of him opening up to take you. When you finally push inside you’re certain you’ll melt to your very core.

He’s so beautiful underneath you, the way he arches his back, the way he meets your thrusts, the way he screams your name as he comes, the way his walls clench around you until you cry out your own release, probably too loud, but you’re too gone to care.

The world seems to right itself on its axis as you both collapse onto the bed in a sweaty tangle of arms and legs, you can’t stop kissing him even in this dazed sated state, can’t stop marveling at the fact that this gorgeous, funny, impossibly kind man wants you. And somehow you know, as you gaze into his smiling eyes, that he’s equally surprised that you want him too.

After a moment there’s a knock on the door and Albus’ voice filter through it.

“So while I’m really happy that you idiots finally figured it out, maybe next time you could bother with a Silencing spell? I’m glad Mum and Dad weren’t here!”

Your face heats at his words, but James throws a book at the door.

“Oi! You’re one to talk, Albus! I’m scarred for life after walking in on you spanking Scorpius with Dad’s spatula in the kitchen!”

There’s a muffled swear from the other side. “I thought we agreed never to bring that up again!” 

“Yeah, well I’ll hold up my end of the bargain if you bugger off!”

There’s silence for a beat, then Albus’ footsteps disappears down the stairs. James flops down beside you again, shaking with laughter.

“Do I want to know?” you ask, barely able to contain your own giggles, it’s contagious.

Still laughing he shakes his head, then looks at you.

“Wait, you hair… it’s…,” he says, furrowing his brow, then sits bolt upright, clutching the sheets around him. “Are you… Am I making you uncomfortable again?”

He sounds so small, so vulnerable. You grab a strand of hair, indeed finding it turquoise once again. And it dawns on you.

“It must be… It’s not when I’m uncomfortable. I thought so because the only other time it’s happened was when Mara Cassowary found a love letter from me to Addison Fir and read it out loud to the entire school, but…” You drift off, unsure how honest you dare to be, but one glance at him tells you you need to lay yourself bare to him. “It’s… It must be when I have strong feelings toward someone.”

For a second he continues to stare at you, and you’re sure you’ve said too much, but then his face lights up in the most brilliant smile you’ve ever seen, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

“Yeah?”

Not trusting your voice, you nod. “Yeah,” you breathe.

Laughing he tackles you onto the bed, kissing you messily.

“ _Merlin_ , you’re going to be the death of me, Teddy Lupin.”

* * *

You wake up early next morning, with James sprawled all over you, his body warm and soft and reassuring. Cautiously, you untangle yourself from him, and when he stirs you slide a hand through his hair, brushing your lips against his temple and whisper, “I’ll be right back.”

He grunts sleepily and turns over, and you take a minute to watch him, you have to shake yourself because you want to crawl down next to him again, but you really need to take a piss. So you slip out of the room and immediately bump into Harry on his way from the bathroom. 

“Oh! Hi, Teddy.” He gives you a smile that looks a bit uncomfortable and you realise you just came out of his son’s bedroom wearing only your pants.

“Er…,” you say, scratching your head and feeling the heat rising in your cheeks.

He smiles again, more genuinely this time. You give him a quick nod and head as quickly as you can to the bathroom door, without making it seem like you’re as uncomfortable as you are. He’s still standing there, regarding you and when you turn the knob he says “I like the new hair colour.”

You still, turning towards him. “Thanks.”

“I hope you’ll keep it that way for a while.”

You realise you’ve been holding your breath and you let it out, your shoulders relaxing.

“Yeah. I do too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos are lovely <3
> 
> I'm also [on tumblr](https://andithiel.tumblr.com//)! Come say hi!


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